Parents are usually one of the most important influences on a child’s development. Young people learn how to form relationships with others through their early (and later) interactions with parents and develop ideas about themselves and other people. Parents can help young people feel valued, self-confident, and emotionally safe, but they can also cause feelings of low self-esteem, worthlessness, and isolation.
Eating disorders are often thought of as a type of ‘internalising problem’ that is rooted in difficult emotions and unhelpful coping mechanisms. They’re linked to feelings of low self-esteem, perfectionism, and interpersonal problems, traits that may be shaped by parents’ attitudes and behaviours.
It’s not surprising, then, that different parenting styles are associated with various types of eating disorders. Affectionless parenting and overcontrol are linked to anorexia nervosa, and low levels of nurturing from mothers are connected to bulimia.
There is less research, however, into the specific effect of fathers’ parenting on a young person’s eating disorder behaviours. However, a few studies have explored the link, recognising that, like mothers, fathers also have an important and influential role in a young person’s development.
This blog offers some information on the causes of eating disorders and the impact of parents on a young person’s development. Specifically, it looks into the connection between fathers’ attachment styles and behaviours and disordered eating among young people.
Psychosocial Development and Emotional Regulation
Research about young people’s development points to the important role that emotional regulation may play in shaping a child’s feelings and behaviours.
Emotional regulation describes the way an individual observes and adjusts their emotional reactions to help them function and achieve goals. Without emotional regulation, young people may experience intense and distressing emotions that are difficult to alleviate and show strong emotional reactions. This is known as emotional dysregulation.
Studies have found that mothers’ parenting styles, as well as children’s temperaments, affect young people’s ability to regulate their emotions. Emotional dysregulation, in turn, is connected to several mental health conditions, including anxiety disorders, anorexia, and bulimia nervosa.
Young people who struggle to manage their emotions in helpful ways may instead use harmful coping mechanisms to try and tolerate, avoid, or distract from their feelings. This may happen when someone experiences very intense emotions that are especially difficult to manage or when they have not learned constructive and healthy coping mechanisms.
Sometimes harmful coping mechanisms may include disordered eating behaviours. Binge eating can be a way of distracting from or relieving emotional distress. Diet restriction and over-exercise can also be an attempt to numb feelings or avoid confronting emotions and memories by focusing on food. In the long term, however, these behaviours only increase emotional distress.
Fathers’ Parenting, Emotional Symptoms, and Eating Disorders
A study among British adolescents found that psychological control and overprotection by fathers were linked to eating disorder behaviours. Psychological control involves intrusive and controlling parenting that creates authority and dependency by constraining, invalidating, and manipulating a child. This might include stopping talking to a child if they do something ‘wrong’ or repeatedly reminding them of past mistakes.
Psychological control can have a big impact on a young person’s sense of self, affecting their identity and autonomy. They may look for autonomy and control in other places, such as their eating behaviours.
Psychological control was also linked to emotional regulation difficulties in young people. In this study, there wasn’t a significant connection between emotional regulation difficulties and eating disorder behaviours. This finding contradicts other research that links emotional dysregulation to anorexia and bulimia; however, the authors note that limitations in the design of the study may explain why no meaningful connection was found.
Fathers’ Authoritarian Parenting and Eating Disorders
A 2009 study found that authoritarian parenting from fathers was linked to eating disorder symptoms. Authoritarian fathers usually have rigid rules that they expect their children to follow. They may enforce these rules through different methods of control, including anger, psychological manipulation, and putting strict limits on what a young person can and can’t do.
As with psychological control, authoritarian parenting may encourage children to seek things in their life that over which they have autonomy, including food and exercise.
Authoritarian parenting may also cause young people to internalise their fathers’ criticisms and judge or criticise themselves and their actions. This can cause traits like low self-esteem and perfectionism that often underpin eating disorders.
Positive Parenting: the Authoritative Style
The authoritative style of parenting is characterised by both ‘demandingness’ and ‘responsiveness’. That is, parents set clear guidelines of how they expect a young person to behave while staying sensitive to their needs. They view their role as a parent as more collaborative and guiding, enabling young people to develop individuality and self-regulate their emotions. It typically involves high levels of warmth and affection and low levels of coercive control.
Authoritative parenting is linked to positive outcomes for young people across a range of economic and social backgrounds.
Reflecting previous findings, the 2009 study found that young people with authoritative fathers were less likely to have disordered eating behaviours. In contrast to authoritarian parenting, authoritative parenting helps to reduce self-judgement among young people and promotes self-confidence and high self-esteem. These traits may protect against developing eating disorders during adolescence or later in life.
Fathers’ Attachment Styles and Eating Disorders
Attachment styles may have an important influence on the way that fathers interact with and raise their children. Attachment styles, based on attachment theory, describe the way that a person forms and maintains relationships, perceives themselves, and trusts in other people. According to attachment theory, they’re mostly shaped by past close relationships (including early relationships with parents) and important life events.
Attachment styles can be either secure or insecure. Secure attachment is characterised by stable, close relationships, emotional openness, and trust in oneself and others. Insecure attachment may involve low self-worth, mistrust in others, a fear of abandonment, and/or avoidance of intimacy.
In one study, 90% of fathers whose children were in eating disorder treatment showed insecure attachment styles. The most common insecure attachment style was avoidant attachment, characterised by avoidance of emotional intimacy and vulnerability. Young people with eating disorders often describe their father as emotionally unavailable and critical, traits reflected in avoidant attachment.
Interestingly, the biggest difference between fathers of young people with eating disorders and fathers of those without was in disorganised attachment. 22% of fathers of young people with eating disorders showed this attachment style, compared to 1% of those without. Adults with disorganised attachment often have confusing and contradictory behaviours and find it hard to alleviate emotional distress.
Preventing and Treating Eating Disorders
Understanding the pathways that lead to eating disorders is fundamental to preventing and treating disordered eating. With the knowledge that certain parenting styles – in particular, criticism, control, and emotional unavailability – among fathers can make eating disorders more likely, we can intervene early to try and change these harmful behaviours.
Not all harmful behaviours are intended and sometimes fathers may not even be aware they of their consequences. Education programs and parenting interventions can help fathers’ identify problematic parenting behaviours and replace them with positive ones. These programs are also crucial in the recovery process, addressing the family dynamics that may sustain disordered eating behaviours.
Family therapy plays an important role in any eating disorder recovery program. It helps families dismantle the structures and behaviours that slow recovery and build a supportive environment that nurtures growth and change. Family therapy may be offered alongside other eating disorder treatment modalities, such as CBT-e and trauma-focused therapy.
The Wave Clinic: Specialist Recovery Programs for Adolescents and Young Adults
The Wave Clinic offers residential and outpatient mental health treatment spaces for children, teenagers, and young adults. Our programs make a difference in the lives of young people, combining exceptional clinical care with education, community work, and an international gap year experience. Our residential centre provides a safe and supported environment where young people can grow, learn, and be inspired.
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