Exam stress is common among young people around the world. Pressure from teachers, schools, family members and wider society can make young people feel like their lives and self-value depend on their exam results. Young people may experience intense anxiety and distress about revision and the grades they will receive.
Incidents of self-harm, suicide attempts and hospitalisations typically rise during exam season as a result of the immense pressure that teenagers and young adults experience. Research has connected exam periods with intensified mental health symptoms in young people in different regions of the globe.
In this context, supporting young people during exam season and changing the culture around exams and educational achievement are urgent needs. Parents can play a part in this process through the attitudes they share and the support and care they offer.
In this blog, we offer some advice to parents on supporting young people with exam stress and spotting the signs of mental health concerns.
What Are the Signs a Young Person is Facing Mental Health Challenges?
Parents are often among the first to notice when a young person is struggling with their mental health. We’re often intuitively attuned to our children’s moods and behaviours and can sense when something is wrong.
However, parents can also easily overlook or miss the signs of psychological distress, especially if a young person tries to hide it.
Some of the most basic changes to look out for involve appetite and sleep. If a child is sleeping or eating much more or less than usual, it can reflect emotional, psychological and social stress.
Some other signs to look out for include:
- Social withdrawal
- Losing interest in previously enjoyed activities
- Tiredness or lack of energy
- Irritability
- Mood swings
- Engagement in risky or impulsive behaviours
Young people experiencing mental health problems may show a few, many, or none of these signs. That means it’s important to stay open-minded and keep checking in with how a child is feeling. Subtle but consistent changes in behaviour are often the most reliable signals.
High Grades and Mental Health Challenges
Sometimes, parents are quick to judge the well-being of a young person based on their school grades. We might think that because a child is achieving academically, they are also coping well psychologically.
However, in reality, many young people who receive high grades experience mental health disorders, including depression, anxiety and eating disorders. High achievement can also be linked to perfectionism, which increases young people’s vulnerability to mental health challenges.
How Can Parents Support Young People with Exam Stress?
During exam season, simple but consistent actions from parents can make a big difference.
Holding Open Conversations
Open conversations are one of the best ways to offer emotional support to a young person. They also help us to find out how a young person is coping and what kind of additional support they may require.
As parents, we should seek to create environments where young people feel comfortable speaking about their emotions and how they are feeling. This means sharing our own emotions and letting a young person know we are available to talk. It’s important to ask open questions, such as “how are you feeling about your exams?” without forcing a young person to respond if they don’t feel like it.
Within these conversations, we shouldn’t focus on revision or results. Instead, we should be curious about a young person’s emotional well-being. If a child shares with you some of the challenges they face, resist the urge to offer quick solutions, as this can leave a young person feeling misunderstood or minimised. Try to validate their emotions and experience through statements like “that must be really hard” or “I understand why you feel this way”.
Creating a Positive Culture Around School, Exams and Self-Worth
Parents have a huge influence on their children’s values and perspectives. The messages we send through our speech and actions shape how young people understand themselves and the world around them.
When trying to prevent exam-related anxiety and distress, we need to create a culture that emphasises effort and well-being over outcomes: a culture that values young people for their many strengths and attributes, rather than their academic achievements.
Parents should try to reduce pressure as much as possible, taking care about how often they ask about revision or results. Be mindful of the language you use around success or failure, reminding young people that there are many different pathways and life directions they can follow beyond these exams.
Let young people know that their self-value doesn’t depend on their exam results or academic or other achievements, instead emphasising their inherent worth as a person.
Encouraging Routines and Self-Care
When young people feel stressed, they may start to overlook self-care practices, neglecting their basic needs like eating well, exercising, having fun and resting. Supporting young people in building a balanced routine can help ensure they continue these practices throughout the exam season.
Encourage them to spend time away from screens and revision, taking regular breaks for movement, socialising and resting. Help them maintain a balanced sleeping schedule and a nutritious diet.
Role-Modelling Positive Behaviours
Young people not only learn attitudes and beliefs from their parents, but also internalise and mirror their emotions and expressions. Children can be quick to mirror parental anxiety and distress. Staying calm and keeping things in perspective ourselves can help children to do the same.
Seeking Support If Something Seems Wrong
It’s important for parents to keep an eye on warning signs and react quickly if something doesn’t seem right. If we notice changes in moods or behaviours, we shouldn’t ignore them. Instead, trust your instincts and check in with your child about how they are doing.
If you’re concerned about a young person’s well-being, you could contact their school, GP or a mental health professional. Seeking support early can prevent mental health challenges from getting worse and avoid multiple kinds of harm. Collaborative decision-making is important, and involving a young person in help-seeking processes can help them feel more in control.
The Wave Clinic: Transformative Recovery Programs for Young People and Families
The Wave Clinic offers specialist mental health treatment spaces for young people and families. We provide trauma-focused, family-centred programs that emphasise the role of past experiences and interpersonal relationships in shaping how young people think, feel and act today.
We offer residential and outpatient programs, as well as family intensives at home or in discrete locations.
If you’re interested in finding out more about our programs, get in touch today. We’re here to make a difference.
